It was a success

Saturday, June 21, 2008 - First Garden Meeting for invitees.

Last Saturday, after days of preparation, we could welcome 150 guests in our garden.

People who came to look at and listen to three women who had to tell a special story.

On the Thursday before, we were visited by the newspaper “Independence Saturday” who wanted to write an article on the work we do.

Unfortunately, when published the focus of the article had changed a bit, paying more attention to rape, and the mission of Incognito Khulani Simunye was translated completely differently. But then, you never know with the press (see article).

Many people read the article as became clear by the various reactions we got.

Fortunately the article appeared on the day we had our Garden Meeting. In fact, I was a bit worried that we would get too many visitors but luckily that did not happen and we were able to entertain and touch 150 people with our show and speeches.

This was the programme:

14:00 Opening with a choir
14:05 Welcome and explanation of the programme

14:15 First speaker: Thandazile Nzama

14:30 An act played by orphans about AIDS/HIV
14:45 Short break with the choir
14:55 Second speaker: Jessica Foord
15:15 Songs by gogo
15:20 Third speaker: Thulisile Blose
16:00 Break with the choir and fresh soup !
16:15 Continuation Thulisile
16:45 Act played by orphans about Domestic Violence
16:55 Entertainment: choir, dancing acts, songs and music
17:30 End of the programme



A full programme making following message very clear:

Break the silence and come forward !

Herewith we want to encourage people to speak about their personal situation and to tell them it is not a shame to have to ask for help.

By filling the programme with a choir and children playing an act, it became light and cheerful which is very important when you ought to listen to the following emotional stories.

Thandazile Nzama:

A woman with four children and a baby met a man with whom she fell in love.

Blinded by love she had unsafe sex and was infected by the AIDS virus.

She only discovered it when she was already seriously ill. She was so ill that she had given up life and was already making plans for the future of her children. She even thought about the preparations for her funeral.

Until the day that she spoke out her need for help and pronounced that she didn’t want to die at all. That day has saved her life. By pronouncing her needs, her whole life changed. She got help, people listened to her cry for help.

She is now on ARV and lives a healthy life. The weak woman of a year ago completely disappeared.

Thandazile is a strong woman now who knows what to do.

She is even so strong that she faces every criticism and tells about her status without shame.

“By doing so I want to wake up everybody and make clear that living with AIDS is not the end of your life.”

Jessica Foord:

A relaxed walk with her father and dogs ended in a straight nightmare.

When Jes and her father enjoyed a walk in the beautiful woods of Shongweni, they were addressed by five young guys.

They claimed their money and the keys of the car.

While 1 of the boys tried to start the car, Jes and here father were held. When the car did not want to start, they got aggressive.

Jes and her father had to follow them, further off the mountain where the father was tied up to a tree and had to look how his daughter was raped till 4 times.

“They forced me to move with them, but I couldn’t. The only thing I could think about was that my father had to watch how his daughter was raped …”

Thulisile Blose:

Living a whole life, ever since you’re a kid, with fear, aggression, maltreatment and abuse … it is hard to imagine.

When Thulisile married to escape from home, she thought to leave the misery behind her but discovered pretty soon that she had started a new life of oppression.

The beating and dreadful words were nothing yet compared to what she had still to expect.

16 years Thulisile lived under the power of her husband. When she discovered that her little daughter of 5 was sexually abused, she found the strength to fight back.

She climbed out of hell to become a strong and proud woman who is tired that thousands of women accept that their men can do with them what they want. She is tired that children, who cannot defend themselves, are abused and deprived from their childhood.

The daughter and two sons of Thulisile had a terrible childhood, but look now at their mother with pride; their mother who speaks and encourages people to come up for themselves.

Thulisile and her three children are still under treatment for their trauma, but slowly they find the power to live up together.

Three stories, three realities that are still actual. Every day people experience the same misery and don’t know what to do at all.

This afternoon was important for the communities.

We already know that it will not end with this first day. We are already planning a next meeting. People ask for more, people need examples, and we are very willing to give these.

“We are no victims but survivors” is what Jess wanted to let them hear.

“Boys and girls, don’t get blinded by love, use condomes.” was Thandazile’s message.

“Listen to your children” was a cry of Thulisile
Let the message be clear.

Gunter

A lot of preparations

To organize a successful day asks for a lot of preparation.

To welcome people, you need something to offer them.

Hereunder some pictures of the labour preceding the Garden Meeting

The children of Agape -- humiliated ---

Last weekend we could enjoy the beautiful voices of the choir of Agape, an orphanage in Waterfall.

The children have a choir for some time now and recorded already 2 cd’s. Since this year Agape has also a dancing-group and it’s wonderful to see them busy.

Last Saturday the children were allowed to perform in the ICC, the great music centre in the centre of Durban. Of course we wanted to be present.

After a stumbling start, the show took off and there were three head artists who gave the best of themselves.

We were informed that part of the sponsoring would go to Agape. The check was handed over in public to Pamela, manager of Agape.

Then of course she was given the microphone. She expressed her gratitude and announced publicly that all the children have AIDS.

I could not believe my ears! In public, in front of the camera and so many people in the arena, she said that the children of Agape have AIDS. I specifically checked if I heard well … it was namely all in Zulu, and yes, it was confirmed to me up to three times. I thought: “How humiliating for the children.”

Also in South-Africa it is not allowed to make the status of people common knowledge without having permission to do so.

And certainly not to proclaim that a group of children has AIDS while you know that these children DO NOT HAVE AIDS.

In less than 3 minutes I got the next surprise. Zodwa, the manager of Agape got the microphone and said that she was very grateful for the donation of R20.000-00 and that this was the first time someone ever helped them. She said with a loud voice: “NEVER has anyone helped us.”’

It made me laugh … laugh very hard, certainly because just a short while before a part of a film was played in which was to see that the children recorded a CD and made a luxurious trip to New York.

On Sunday we could meet the children in the garden of a lounge bar in Kloof. It was very cosy and we could spend the whole evening with the children.

Many amongst you know that I have a very close relationship with these children, so know that I enjoyed this tremendously.

And of course, the event of he day before in ICC was brought up.

The children were angry, very angry. They expressed their dis contentedness about the fact that there was said that the children have AIDS. They don’t know what to do. They are afraid to say something because they fear to be thrown out and to loose their shelter.

I feel sorry for them and would like to support them by putting this story on my weblog, so I can at least tell that it is not true.

The humiliation they have to bear now on top of all other things they had to suffer in their young lives, is unbearable.

I hope this may help a bit.

Gunter

It is unbelievable what is happening

A few weeks ago we met a very kind lady who was visiting friends of us.

Janet Blose was introduced to us as the mother of a young little girl, who knew with her children a dreadful past.

After this first meeting, Janet started to tell about her past. It is not to describe what happened to us. We sat listening all fascinated and let our tears run. Her story was so inhuman that we didn’t understand why this woman did not give up live.

After she had finished, she let us know that she was tired of the silence and wants to tell her story to the world.

The fact that so many people keep quiet and stay in the struggle where they should not be in, disgusts her.

The abuses, the humiliations, the power games, the torments people still suffer today, are unknown. By letting Janet tell her story, people will rise and come forward.

I immediately got an urge to do something with this information, and I promised Janet that we would work on it.

At that time I didn’t have a clue how this could be realized, but I was convinced that it would happen.

Now! We got that far !!

After weeks of thinking we have planned a date and all necessary pieces of the puzzle fall at the right place.

Our message is: “People, come forward and stop the silence”.

We want to encourage people to talk about their home situation.

We want to show the injustice and especially spread the message that EVERY person has his rights, man, woman, child, girl, boy, black, white, coloured … each individual has his right and can claim his right.

On Saturday, June 21, 2008 we have a garden meeting to which many people are invited.

It is my wish to gather all kinds of people there: pour, rich, white, black, you name it.

It is important to mix cultures, so that both cultures understand that they encounter are similar situations.

It doesn’t matter for a rapist if you are black or white …

The programme looks as follows:

- introduction of Incognito Khulani Simunye;

- a black woman from Molweni speaks about her HIV/AIDS status and how she lives with it;

- a white young lady will tell about her rape that was recently large news in the newspapers;

- Janet fills the largest part of the programme.

We fill the programme in between with a gospel choir, with two acts played by children (aids and a family situation), and with music and dance.

A well filled programme in which we put a very strong message.

I am really honoured that we can do this.

Even the press comes. Next week Tuesday we have an interview with the reporters and an article will appear in The Independence, one of the largest newspapers of Natal.

The invitations are distributed and we get daily telephone calls of people who confirm their presence.

This is huge. The first time that two black ladies and a white lady will tell their story in this way.

This day is also important for our organization. Although this is not an official “opening”, we do get a serious name reputation.

I am so proud. I am happy that finally a part of my dream becomes reality.

To be continued !!!

Gunter

Just something personal

I wrote this for my precious daughter

Every day, from dawn to dust you are there,
Every day, from dawn to dust I am there,
Every day, from dawn to dust we are there.

It doesn’t matter if you cry,
It doesn’t matter if you laugh,
It doesn’t matter if you are hungry.

You are there,
I am there,
We are there.

The love you give,
The love I give,
The love we give.

Being one together,
Being one together with others,
Being one together with the world.

The sun is there for you,
The sun is there for me,
The sun is there for us.

You your space,
Me my space,
We our space.

To miss is beautiful,
Not to know is worse,
Not knowing is painful.

The peace, it will come,
When we know,
That’s were I’m longing for, for you, for me, for us.

I love you

Papa

Invitation

INVITATION

Incognito Khulani Simunye has the pleasure to invite you to come and listen with us to Jeanette Blosi.

The doors will be open:

14h00 on Saturday the 21^st of June 2008.

Crestholme, 21 Ridgemont Road

Jeanette comes from the South Coast and would like to tell about her past. Jeanette went true a terrible time with her husband and daughter.

After telling her story she had the strong feeling that she can not keep quit anymore and we share that same feeling.

The power, Jeanette found to continue and stand up to fight for her own rights, is incredible, and we would like to honor her to give her the opportunity to speak out.

We believe it is important that people come forward and share their stories with others.

Therefore we hope you will be able to come and join the afternoon with us.

Please let us know if you will be present, you can contact us on:

Mail: incognito.rsa@gmail.com

uthando@telkomsa.net

Phone: cell 073 912 80 34

Lline: 031 776 39 68

Post: Po Box 486

3652 Linkhills

Places are limited; please let us know in advance if you can come.

Gunter & Lizzy

Can you believe this ?

It’s more than 15 years now that I live with a fear, a fear I thought I would never overcome. And people who know me won’t believe their eyes.

OH YES!!! I have driven a horse, and that, for more than an hour.

Two weeks ago we were invited by friends in Underberg (near Drakensberg). They own a backpacker over there and it was rather quite (low saison) at that time and they wanted to invite us to relax.

We could, of course, not deny such an offer and planned immediately to spend a short weekend there.

Khotso, the backpackers of our friends, are known for their horse riding.
Each time we visit them they try to get me on a horse … but no, no. This young man will not go on a horse!

I have a dreadful fear of it, for years already !!!

But something seems to have happened to me. Also the work we do here can change a lot of things in you. Your view on life broadens and handling fears changes. And that’s exactly what happened to me.

Suddenly the fear was gone. I stood next to a horse and my heart kept beating normally. I even touched the horse. I did not run away when it moved its head.

It was a very special experience. I didn’t understand it at first. Me, who has always been such a frightened creature, running away when a horse was even at a 10 meters’ distance from me ….and now I stayed quiet and even enjoyed the presence of this beautiful animal.

And now, still to get on the horse while it is moving and then guiding the animal …. pfff, can I do that …

Well, just as easy as the contact with the horse went, all the rest went perfect.
When we were finally on the road into the mountains, a form of fear nevertheless assaulted me: What if I still get afraid, while we are in the mountains?”
But I immediately talked to myself: “Gunter, are you going to make yourself afraid because you might get afraid??”
“Ridiculous” I thought.

When we were on the mountains, I got a very warm feeling inside and tears ran over my cheeks.
Me on a horse in the mountains … this is something I’ve never dreamed of. I clearly realized that I had overcome one of my worst fears!

I cried for happiness, for the feeling of sitting on a horse, for the beautiful views.
I cried for all people we are allowed to get to know and for the environment we are working in.

When you look at the pictures, you will understand how beautiful and nice it is to walk in the mountains on a horse.